Today, I re-dialed a “missed call” from an acquaintance, and got a busy tone with the message “this number is busy” in multiple languages.
I was about to cancel the call when I heard “Press ‘1’ to know more – we are piloting an analytics engine.”
I was intrigued, and pressed “1”. Here is what was conveyed (the gist):
“93% of the time, this subscriber disconnects his outgoing calls (gender confirmed through subscriber Profile data), before these calls are picked up. Most likely (86% probability), he is trying to save his call costs. He developed this habit earlier, but continues even when the free call limit is infinity.”
“His number is also busy most of time. That is because he is either inefficient in transacting his business quickly (34% probability) or is lonely and wants to prolong the conversation (43% probability), other reasons account for the rest of the probability.”
“If you can satisfy your requirements (information needs or your own need for chatting with someone) through other means, you are likely to be better off.”
“Press ‘2’ to know information about yourself – based on the pilot analytics engine”.
I automatically pressed ‘2’ before realizing my blunder. The disembodied voice continued:
“The fact that you are calling a usually busy number and have the patience to listen to this robotic voice, indicates that you too may be looking for some company/ any kind of company.”
“There are many chatbots available on the net and as mobile apps – chatting with them may be useful (some are also free 🙂 ).”
I quickly disconnected – I had enough.
What do you think of the analytics? And the counselor Bot?
Do share your comments in the space provided below.